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People who are offended and grossed out at such images would like them banned.

They want men to understand that such behaviors are rude, unacceptable and should simply stop.

One issue is that men just aren't good at hearing, or responding to "No." I'm not excusing that.

But this same dynamic, that men think women are sexually as excited as they are, is getting in the way of men hearing the "No, we DON'T want to see that!

They feel some pride that their penis generated this strong reaction. But if we remove as much of the reinforcement, including negative attention, many of these men might view this behavior as ultimately unrewarding.

So, shaming, banning, flaming strategies are unlikely to be successful. It's important that women, and men, understand that this behavior, even when it feels distasteful and rude, is not personal.

At least, in terms of sending the pictures unrequested.

Both males and females are commonly sending nudes of themselves to people they meet online, but women tend to wait until asked.

In a clever twist, one woman started sending men pics of female genitals.She was surprised that overwhelmingly, men loved it, found her boldness both sexy and fun, and wanted to meet her.So, again, we have evidence that men are sending such pictures because they think others will like them, as much as they do.Smartphones, texting, email and online dating are the current vehicle for this behavior and sexual dynamic, but let's not pretend that this is a new issue.The underlying sexual processes and dynamics have always been with us.

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